Have you ever met someone who offered you more honesty than you were prepared for? Maybe they were “keeping it real” or exhibiting some “profile in courage.” “Since May is “Mental Health Month,” I’ve had a few conversations that made me ponder the value of open, honest communication.
While getting my car serviced, I observed a store employee being asked for assistance. The employee asked the customer to wait for the manager. He added, “I’d help you, but I don’t read or write.” I sat listening to this humble working man. I was privately stunned and mortified, thinking we don’t all share the same fundamental path and life experience. So, I appreciated him for his kindness and work ethic as we chatted, and he located and escorted me to my car.
A polite encounter with a retired neighbor also led to another revelation. I noticed her new car missing in our parking lot and assumed she was out of town. She volunteered, “No, it was repoed!” she said. I expressed sympathy for her plight, sharing that banks are heartless. She smiled and said she hoped to get it back. I walked away thinking I learned more than I ever thought about my neighbor on a carefree evening walk.
We often politely ask, “How are you?” and folks tell us! I soon learned about breakups, bankruptcies, job losses, foreclosures, illnesses, tragic deaths, and other life-altering events. In fact, sometimes, a casual and friendly chat goes deep very quickly. Some people might overshare, but some are living through difficult times and have a lot on their minds.
You can learn much about living and owning your truth from people who’ve “been there and done that.” I first noticed honesty and realness with a relative once she retired and her husband passed. She would reflect on her life and speak of survival and growth. Fortunately, she found her voice! She shared whatever troubled her and refused to keep pain and frustration inside.
Many people don’t abide by old notions of personal and emotional boundaries or being too proud to talk. Talking is good, given the concern about the impact of isolation and loneliness today among the young and old. People aren’t disappearing and hiding their painful or embarrassing truths! A friend reminded me that people must be honest and open; how else could you know someone without this? And how could you possibly help without putting the truth on the table?
Live&Work 4healthyu 