Tag: Mental health

How to Appreciate a Good Manager: Career Reflections

by ETWellness, posted in Careers, Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Mental health, Smart and Well

My boss suddenly announced his retirement: “I’ve nothing to prove and I’ve worked a gazillion years!” I clapped and smiled, publicly supporting him, but privately I pondered. It has been a while, so this is a good time to share a few notes from my work diary.

Indeed, he’s been a great manager – fair, fun, honest, and even-tempered. He treats our team like grown-ups, professionals, and gets out of our way!  He also doesn’t smother us with his presence or title. He simply manages a team, a WFH one too, with accountability, and respect.  How would you rate your own? What would you like to see in your current or next manager?

I can’t assume the newbie will be so agreeable! They all come with different management styles, levels of maturity, and work experience.  I know a bad boss can have a huge impact on careers and mental health! The worst ones left a lasting impression and motivated me to treat others well. In time, I found greater confidence and a stronger voice. Family, friends, faith, and mentors all helped. So, keep a strong support system!

I’m not far from my manager in age, so I find myself reflecting on my career journey. There is something exhilarating and inspiring about working with decent, positive, supportive people every day.  Managers who listen are rock stars!  Great ones share their own stories, their expertise, and mentor others.  Everyone should experience at least one commited to their growth and success – not just his or her own!

I’m appreciative of all the lessons I’ve learned. I’m so thankful for work, skills mastered, wonderful colleagues, and a paycheck. But, I also welcome my exit some day.  Like my boss, I hope to say I’ve done enough and know it’s time to move on.

OMG, the class reunion!

by ETWellness, posted in Uncategorized

This reunion year is huge! Let’s just say I’m a mature graduate! But, like many people, I’m stressing about what to wear and more importantly, what it all means! Can a school reunion be good for my health and well-being? I have a couple of thoughts to share.

First, we now look like our parents instead of the students I remember! I find this disturbing and funny, too! Somehow, I thought of others (like my parents) getting older, not me, not us! There is a mix of emotions about aging, a little insecurity (work, retirement, and life), and grudging acceptance. After all, we are adults now! I wouldn’t want to change time and return to my 18- or 21-year-old self, would you?

Second thought, we represent a rich, diverse group. Our adult lives reflect meaningful work, marriage, divorce, children, travel, and more. Our connection to the school was not just classes but a solid affinity for clubs, organizations, and communities reflecting us. Your “community” could have been band, team sports, fraternities, LBGT, language clubs, theater, and students (Hispanic, Jewish, African, etc.). Schools (especially colleges) nurture and support many communities and interests under one big tent.

My third thought takes me to the inevitable comparison game! I look around at many accomplished people and wonder: ‘Have I done enough personally and professionally?’ Did I fully challenge myself? Some classmates did what they said they would, while others landed in other roles and places. Grown-up me knows everyone has faced detours, successes, and failures in life. 

So, we’re returning to our alma mater! Admittedly, I’m grateful! For me, college facilitated many incredible adventures and life experiences. I regret not sticking with Spanish and pursuing a study abroad program! Back then, I gave up too quickly when challenged! Today, I’m confident and open to learning! That’s the endearing gift of school!

My friends and I decided to embrace the moment and have fun. Cheers to all! Go Cats!

“Hon, have you found your place?”

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Uncategorized

If you close your eyes, I bet you can think of many places you once thought were heaven! You arrived there and found beauty, contentment, inspiration, peace, and more. For example, I visited an enchanting, rural, sun-kissed retreat in the southeast a few years ago. It still is magnificent. But today, I realize my sense of the perfect place has changed, and I see people, places, and things differently.

The perfect place is more than just a fantastic beach, lake, or national park. Your place could be a favorite city, town, or country. Your place is a long-desired job, an industry, business, or profession that allows you to be your best or earn a living. Perhaps your place is a church, gym, home, school, or any location that captures your mind, body, and spirit. I discovered my happy place after moving from a cold state to a more temperate climate, and now I love winters at home!

Perhaps your place is with people. You feel like you’re in the right place with great friends, family, a loving partner or spouse, or whomever you call your people. Once again, the list could be long here. In your mind and heart, you know when the right folks surround you!

Beyond places and people, we find joy in things. My perfect list included a summer night baseball game with fireworks, a championship basketball game, concerts, and fun 5K and 10K races. My perfect things included roller skating, movies, and great art at local museums. And finally, my happy place had good books, writing, and blogs, all things I could lose myself in.

A friend once suggested I stop searching for a perfect place in life and focus on the here and now! He thought I was missing something, not fully appreciating the moment, and always looking for something else. My feelings about my happy place have evolved as I’ve gotten older. Indeed, I must give myself the time, patience, and grace to enjoy the many experiences before me that confirm – I’ve found my place!

Two Boys and a Bird

by ETWellness, posted in Uncategorized
Photo by Matthias Zomer on Pexels.com

I walked past a Two Men and a Truck and thought about summertime, the frenzy of people moving, and kids running and playing. This simple concept stuck with me. Oddly enough, this title is still appropriate and reflects what I observed and learned.

As I enjoyed a quick walk, Boy #1 suddenly appeared alongside me on his bike. I smiled and said hello to the little stranger, and he mentioned that another boy was in trouble! What kind of trouble, I asked? He said the boy had a bird and wouldn’t let it go! He said he told him to leave it alone, but he, Boy #2, wouldn’t listen. I assured him he’d done his best. Then, thinking about something on my stove, I said goodbye.

After I arrived home, I thought about Boy #1 and decided to check on Boy #2. So, I went in search of the boys. I soon discovered Boy #2 in the middle of the parking lot with his bike abandoned nearby. He held a tiny bird in the palms of his small hands, studying it intensely. He found the baby bird on the ground and believed it was still alive. I told him I doubted the bird would survive and suggested he move him out of the hot sun and place him on the grass. He did so and volunteered that help was on the way! I asked him to promise me he’d thoroughly wash his hands when he arrived home.

Help soon arrived in the form of a young mother and baby in a stroller. The mother picked up the bird in a paper towel and gingerly carried it over to a tree. She then supervised the burial of the bird in the leaves. Boy #1 continued to ride in small circles, watching everything.

I couldn’t help but think about both boys. Their reactions reflected their parent’s teachings. One boy was cautious, concerned, and kept a safe distance, and the other boy was fearless, curious, and focused on the bird. Yet, they both sought help from adults at this moment. The boys reminded me of how I grew up, cared about others, and learned to take risks.