Live&Work 4healthyu

Grief during the holidays

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Grief, Lifestyles, Mental health, The Holidays

Yes, death sometimes happens during the holidays. Suddenly, you are stunned, almost speechless, as you face the loss of a loved one. With a big family, I’ve seen my share of loss. So, allow me to take a minute or two to share some of what I’ve learned.

First, you’re often left with many, many questions! You suddenly realize you’ll never get a chance to talk again, to pose questions, and to get good, honest answers. Your loved one is no longer here.

You’ve got regrets, too. Beyond the conversations you’ll never have again, you can’t spend time together and make new memories. Perhaps you were so busy living your life that you didn’t have time to make your loved one a greater priority. So, you have questions and lots of guilt.

Now, you must drop everything and prioritize gathering to say goodbye. You have travel arrangements, work demands, kids to consider, and other obligations. This time is stressful and challenging. The holidays are a real complication, but there’s never a convenient time to die, is there?

I recently binged on a comedy/drama on Netflix where a main character died suddenly. It was entertainment and TV, but the shock (and plot twist) forced other characters to react. In a raw moment, grieving family and friends dropped f-bombs in the deceased’s name! Family and friends questioned her and their own priorities and choices. There was anger and regret about missed time together. The funeral was about the dead, the living, and how they’ll continue.

I’ve found great comfort in talking with family and friends after the loss of a loved one. They’ve helped me sort through questions I have. After all, we all had a relationship with the same loved one, experienced different interactions, and had rich insight. They could answer some of my questions. But we all had regrets, too. We spoke about missed chances (in our busy lives) to visit and spend more time together. We finally talked about gratitude, simply saying, “I love you, or I’m proud of you,” and allowing ourselves the grace to learn and do better with those left behind.

So, again, death happens. As my friend would say, ‘None of us are missing this finale!’ But I still have a heavy heart. I’ll get up today, head to a favorite park, and take pictures of nature. During my hike, I’m sure I’ll see my friend smiling and encouraging me to go forward and live my best life!

Be kind to yourself and others, and Happy Holidays!

“Hon, have you found your place?”

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Uncategorized

If you close your eyes, I bet you can think of many places you once thought were heaven! You arrived there and found beauty, contentment, inspiration, peace, and more. For example, I visited an enchanting, rural, sun-kissed retreat in the southeast a few years ago. It still is magnificent. But today, I realize my sense of the perfect place has changed, and I see people, places, and things differently.

The perfect place is more than just a fantastic beach, lake, or national park. Your place could be a favorite city, town, or country. Your place is a long-desired job, an industry, business, or profession that allows you to be your best or earn a living. Perhaps your place is a church, gym, home, school, or any location that captures your mind, body, and spirit. I discovered my happy place after moving from a cold state to a more temperate climate, and now I love winters at home!

Perhaps your place is with people. You feel like you’re in the right place with great friends, family, a loving partner or spouse, or whomever you call your people. Once again, the list could be long here. In your mind and heart, you know when the right folks surround you!

Beyond places and people, we find joy in things. My perfect list included a summer night baseball game with fireworks, a championship basketball game, concerts, and fun 5K and 10K races. My perfect things included roller skating, movies, and great art at local museums. And finally, my happy place had good books, writing, and blogs, all things I could lose myself in.

A friend once suggested I stop searching for a perfect place in life and focus on the here and now! He thought I was missing something, not fully appreciating the moment, and always looking for something else. My feelings about my happy place have evolved as I’ve gotten older. Indeed, I must give myself the time, patience, and grace to enjoy the many experiences before me that confirm – I’ve found my place!

How’s your Mother’s Day?

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, I Feel Good!, Mental health, Smart and Well, Uncategorized

I enjoyed a lovely Mother’s Day service at church. Yes, they preached, sang, and presented powerful poetry about the virtues of mothers. Mine has “gone on to glory,” so I can relate to those who miss their moms. As I listened, I couldn’t help but think that as tempting as it is to sing familiar praises, some relationships with mothers are or have been less than perfect! Sorry, but that’s the grown-up truth in this month of May honoring greater awareness of our mental health. So, I’m struck by an overwhelming sense of emotion as I think about mothers. I can admit, I heard you, Mom! My life is richer for her many contributions. Finally, my wings are strong and flight worthy. She gave me all I needed to fly on my own. This is truly one of the greatest virtues of mothers! Indeed, Happy Mother’s Day!

What did you just say?!!

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Mental health

Have you ever met someone who offered you more honesty than you were prepared for? Maybe they were “keeping it real” or exhibiting some “profile in courage.” “Since May is “Mental Health Month,” I’ve had a few conversations that made me ponder the value of open, honest communication.

While getting my car serviced, I observed a store employee being asked for assistance. The employee asked the customer to wait for the manager. He added, “I’d help you, but I don’t read or write.” I sat listening to this humble working man. I was privately stunned and mortified, thinking we don’t all share the same fundamental path and life experience. So, I appreciated him for his kindness and work ethic as we chatted, and he located and escorted me to my car.

A polite encounter with a retired neighbor also led to another revelation. I noticed her new car missing in our parking lot and assumed she was out of town. She volunteered, “No, it was repoed!” she said. I expressed sympathy for her plight, sharing that banks are heartless. She smiled and said she hoped to get it back. I walked away thinking I learned more than I ever thought about my neighbor on a carefree evening walk.

We often politely ask, “How are you?” and folks tell us! I soon learned about breakups, bankruptcies, job losses, foreclosures, illnesses, tragic deaths, and other life-altering events. In fact, sometimes, a casual and friendly chat goes deep very quickly. Some people might overshare, but some are living through difficult times and have a lot on their minds.

You can learn much about living and owning your truth from people who’ve “been there and done that.” I first noticed honesty and realness with a relative once she retired and her husband passed. She would reflect on her life and speak of survival and growth. Fortunately, she found her voice! She shared whatever troubled her and refused to keep pain and frustration inside.

Many people don’t abide by old notions of personal and emotional boundaries or being too proud to talk. Talking is good, given the concern about the impact of isolation and loneliness today among the young and old. People aren’t disappearing and hiding their painful or embarrassing truths! A friend reminded me that people must be honest and open; how else could you know someone without this? And how could you possibly help without putting the truth on the table?

Photo by August de Richelieu on Pexels.com

OMG, the finish line!

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Fitness, I Feel Good!

I wanted to experience the waves and adulation of cheering crowds and the loud bells and whistles on race day! A lovely professional photograph and medal would be sweet too! Instead, I arrived at the finish line of my virtual 10K alone, but with a new appreciation for all that motivates, inspires, and strengthens me in my health and wellness journey.

I worked diligently with a local YMCA training club. I was well prepared but wasn’t crazy about the logistics of getting to and from the big event, let alone twenty-five thousand athletes and visitors. Finally, after an awful night with little sleep, I woke late and set out on a personal timed race. At this moment, I saw my first motivation (me!) and an intense need to get the job done! I told myself that this day was like every other one, that I needed to move, and that the exercise made me feel great! Days like this are often solitary for me but no less powerful.

As I completed my 10K, I realized how inspired I’ve been by family members no longer with us. Some had significant health issues. Some wished they could have been more active in their adult years. I also thought about people I know who wish they could be more physically active right now but can’t. But then, I saw their faces as I exercised – grinning, smiling, waving, and encouraging me on race day!

I previously shared how much I enjoyed practicing with the YMCA training group and missed my team! But on race day, I felt their presence and was empowered and inspired by their stories. Some had injuries and overcame illnesses. Some managed busy schedules and stressful jobs. One shared how depression and a breakup challenged her. Today, we’re all now on the other side of everyday challenges. This realization made me feel pretty darn good!

I approached the finish line (a hot, sweaty mess!) with a smile. The sun shone, the clouds held the rain, and the day was unseasonably warm. Once again, I realized the outdoors and exercise can feel like a spiritual, grounding and life-affirming experience. I cooled down and thanked God for my safe journey. I felt great at the finish line and look forward to doing this again!

Well, this is my birthday, isn’t it?

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Aging with grace!, Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Fitness, I Feel Good!, Lifestyles, Smart and Well, Uncategorized

Sometimes, even birthdays, become enmeshed in politics! I was reminded of this when I asked a colleague to not broadcast my day on the company intranet. She replied, “But, everyone will think we don’t care about you!” Yes, birthdays are more political than they should be! Consider this:

Big cakes and little cakes! At work, I’ve seen beautiful, elaborately decorated cakes for some, and last-minute, generic Walmart cakes for others. Why the difference? Well, one person, a manager or key employee is highly-regarded and/or popular, and the other colleague isn’t! Some employees are offered “group cakes” for multiple birthdays in one month or quarter. One clerical manager explained we’d have a cake every week otherwise! Have you ever wondered what your birthday treat says about your place in the office?

Have you experienced a birthday-themed marketing campaign? Instead of wishing us well, we hear from political campaigns and non-profits requesting donations in honor of other people or causes! I must admit, this personal appeal is most annoying to me. Wouldn’t you be annoyed if anyone told you what you should get them for their BD? Family and friends are okay, but a grinning politician?

People can be amazingly insensitive! With so much attention focused on Diversity & Inclusion at work, I’m not sure how “Over the Hill!” party themes would work today, but this was the norm in some offices. I also recall a manager confiding in me how much she wanted to include an employee who doesn’t celebrate holidays and birthdays. She wanted a close and supportive team! So, I asked if she ever considered just respecting the employee and her wishes? My question was met with stony silence.

So, here I am with another birthday at work! I used to take a day or week off to avoid the attention, then my determined manager planned my “surprise” before or after vacation! So, how difficult could it be to celebrate and eat cake? Honestly, I don’t want to be anti-social or politically incorrect, but I prefer my birthday to be mine! I’d love to keep other people and their agendas out of my cake business! And before I forget,

Happy Birthday all “First-Quarter Babies!”

OMG, give me a break!

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Uncategorized

In this country, we treat vacations like one big buffet! We’re ravenous and must devour everything to get our money’s worth! Admittedly, I’m greedy too, but I understand what feeds our collective hunger!

Many of us need more time for travel! When you’ve only a few weeks of vacation time, personal time off (PTO), or, sadly, no paid leave in this country, you feel pressured to maximize the experience. So you rush to your destination and try to see and do as much as possible! Add the misery of traveling today(air, train, and road traffic), and we’re all more stressed.

Travel is wicked expensive! Lodging, transportation, meals, and entertainment can break the bank! Still, we often seek to squeeze in as much as we can. Have you ever splurged on an over-the-top vacation experience? On the other hand, have you ever stayed with family and friends to reduce expenses? Your overspending or thriftiness reflects your response to the cost of travel.

We desperately seek diversions from our daily lives! On the one hand, our minds and bodies beg for variety, stimulation & excitement; on the other, we need rest and a break. When we go on vacation, we feel like the moment is fleeting! So, we rush to get all that we can!

I recently planned a long weekend in the nation’s capital. I had ten things on my list (including museums, monuments, restaurants, etc.). But then, it suddenly hit me that I need R&R too! So, I crossed off most of my list and focused on a few good memories rather than demanding more!

Photo by Oleksandr Pidvalnyi on Pexels.com

Ready to really Spring Forward?

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Fitness, I Feel Good!, Lifestyles, Physical Therapy, Smart and Well, Uncategorized

I wanted to honor my brother by running a marathon with a nonprofit organization that supported him during his illness. A big goal for me, but no execution! So, I found a way to honor him and challenge myself with a local YMCA 10K Training Team! Here’s what I learned:

First, I discovered that less is more (and healthier) with a 10K! My doctor approved and even high-fived me for my interest. But, while my ego wants to go big, my body says no! So, I work with a great bunch of folks every Saturday for ten weeks before the big event. We are motivated to prepare for and complete a popular community-sponsored race and go on this journey together.

Second, it’s exhilarating to train with a group! Ours include runners and walkers, a/k/a “Movers and Shakers!” Our volunteer coaches are passionate about fitness and training. Time flies as we exercise at our own pace, conversing and breathing effortlessly. We are not competitive but focused on an end goal. I’m honestly shocked at how quickly time passes!

Third, an experienced coach is also an excellent partner! Our head coach leads with attention to detail, including lengthy weekly email updates, printed directions for our course, pep talks, and boundless enthusiasm. Our other coaches space out to start and trail behind with slow pokes (like me)! We enjoy tips on hydration, proper shoes and clothes, great stretching, warm-up, and cool-down exercises, and safety tips (staying alert when alone, managing traffic, cell phones, etc.). Our personal weekday programs prepare us for longer Saturday training sessions.

Okay, it’s almost Spring and time to store your winter coat! Are you ready to shake up and move your fitness to a new level? Consider a training group. Maybe, we’ll see you on the road!

“Is it Friday, yet?”

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Lifestyles, Smart and Well, Uncategorized

Photo by Kampus Production on Pexels.com

My friend,

I’m sorry to hear how your job is driving you crazy! There is nothing more demoralizing and stressful. Since I’m a year older and fresh off a break from work, I want to share a few things I’ve learned.

First, I recently discovered a great quote on LinkedIn: “Leaving a toxic workplace is an act of bravery, not defeat!” I wouldn’t call my previous employer “toxic,” but I felt increasingly awful as I held on to a job I had outgrown and worried I couldn’t find something better. But after years of complaining, I finally pivoted to another position! I confidently use my skills in a different place, and I’m happier!

Second, I learned fear of change is a monster, and I must confront it! Staying in a job you hate eats at your self-confidence every day! Yes, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results!” To break this cycle, you must do something else! So I started a blog and volunteer projects to grow my interest in wellness and explore my creative side in writing and public speaking. My avocation didn’t lead directly to a new job but opened the door, allowing me to see other possibilities!

Third, I discovered a toxic workplace is a surface issue, and I had to go deeper! Is the problem a lousy boss or horrible co-workers? Is the problem the work culture or a current mismatch in skills and interests? Perhaps, the real issue is more personal (such as childcare, an aging parent, health, money, etc.) The Pandemic helped many realize what was most important. For me, work-life balance is a huge deal! After decades of working in corporate America, I want to see less of a traditional office and a cubicle!

Toxic job situations happen in all workplaces. So, what’s a stressed-out person to do? First, start inward with honest self-talk. Talk to family, friends, and trusted professionals who can make the conversation about you (and not them!). But ultimately, make a plan that moves you to a better place! You deserve this! I started with baby steps like blogging and volunteering. What about you?

I wish you all the best in your journey!

Ready, set, go!

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Fitness, Health cooking and eatting!, I Feel Good!, Lifestyles

Damn, I need valet services for parking at the health club in the new year. Sadly, it’s business as usual, with plenty of parking by month’s end! Change is challenging, but there’s much to learn about managing new resolutions. Here are a few things I’ve discovered.

January is the perfect time to focus on the power and potential of R-words! So many of us are reassessing, reimagining, recalibrating – you get the picture! We know something didn’t work for us last year and want a fresh start and do-over. “Renewal” is my favorite inspiring R-word, and it comes up in my meditation, exercise, and writing. I’m always thinking, committing, and strengthening my will to renew and find greater joy in my life. What’s your R-word?

We endured a heck of a year, and we’re so much smarter! I enjoyed walking four or five days a week last year. I proudly marked my days on a large wall calendar. Excellent job, I thought as I assessed last year, but I also concluded I need more strength training and challenging cardio. So my plan for 2023 includes new workouts and more creative, healthy ways to manage my low-energy days!

January 1st is a tough time to hit the reset button, so consider another day! One Health & Wellness article suggested change and new beginnings can begin on birthdays, any day, week, quarter, anniversaries, or any momentous day! For example, I started getting my annual physical on my late mom’s birthday. The date is easy to remember and honor her. I’m also motivated by her passion for eating right, regular exercise, and enjoying the outdoors. Her birthday is now a nice healthy habit!

It’s always a great time to embrace wellness, welcome change, and challenge our thinking about what’s good for us. Best wishes for a happy new year!

So, you think you can eat anything, huh?

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Fitness, Health cooking and eatting!, I Feel Good!, Lifestyles, Uncategorized

My 50th POST! – “People are starving in this country, and you’re throwing away food!” My mother would say this and look at me in horror! I was guided by food labels and my own sense of what keeps me safe. Recently, I listened to an NPR news report on widespread confusion regarding food labels. Let’s take a closer look.

We are often confused by the sheer variety of labels, including: “use before,” “sell by,” “expires on, “good by this date,” “best if used by,” etc. The public’s uncertainty about dates on packaged foods leads to up to 20% of waste in this country, according to Frank Yiannas, the FDA Deputy Commissioner on Food Policy and Response. It seems uniform definitions and standards are lacking.

I surveyed my own kitchen and noted many products with NO date! You’d think those foods are suitable for a lifetime! At first, I thought I might have tossed the packaging, but no, many products simply have no date at all! I’m sure our food preparation and safety standards are better than most in the world. The U.S. is an advanced country, but there still seems to be a measure of “buyer beware” here!

To be safe, I follow a few personal rules:

I look at food labels and try to remember the labeled dates. Some properly sealed foods last longer. I also always refrigerate any suggested food after opening.
I’m cautious regarding dented cans and anything that insults my senses. I’m not going there if it doesn’t look, or smell right or food contents have separated.
I won’t risk my stomach on mere “taste tests” with questionable items in the refrigerator or cupboard.

Old-fashioned cooking may address some problems, but I can’t be thrifty and cavalier and expose my digestive system to something that raises red flags.

After a hard upbringing, a friend of mine hated wasting food! He’d proudly claim he has a stomach that can handle anything! This was true until he ate the wrong thing, suffered from food poisoning a few times, and ended up in the hospital. He learned how painful this could be as his body fought an invasion of poison and bad food!

Photo by Jean van der Meulen on Pexels.com

So, a reasonable consumer is wise and educated. The best offense is a strong defense. Your healthy gut is relying on you! So, here’s to good food and healthy, and happy times in your life and home!

I’m not going back there!

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Lifestyles, Uncategorized

I rushed into the local store smiling and salivating at the thought of enjoying an old favorite treat. Actually, I hadn’t had it in years and couldn’t believe my luck when I called, and the manager confirmed it was in stock. I grinned with satisfaction only to soon discover my treat wasn’t so special anymore!

I remember my first incredible steak, my first perfect cocktail, and my first and most fresh seafood. Who hasn’t shared tales of their first experience with their favorite foods?

Call me simple, but I eagerly anticipated Baskin-Robins’ German Chocolate Cake Ice Cream! I recall my first apartment, my job after college, getting off the train, and running to the store for a big scoop on a sugar cone. I lived for this moment at least three times a week! So, after a long work day and a grueling, crowded trip home, a visit was heaven!

I now realize this habit was expensive and terrible for my waistline! Once I changed jobs and moved, I stopped visiting the ice cream shop. I found plenty of good flavors, healthier choices, and less expensive brands in local groceries. I learned to enjoy ice cream but in moderation. Today, I’m also not fond of overly sweet, creamy desserts full of candy, nuts, caramel sauce, etc. For me, “less is more!” and I’m healthier and happy with my new grown-up reality.

My first experience with just one food (ice cream!) was memorable and oddly connected to my early adult years. I was learning how to work, manage a difficult commute, and cope with stress. Yes, it seems our first initiation with people, products, and services can be intense and strong. Sometimes, we get a whiff of something we like or love, which stays with us! Time and personal growth have helped me see things differently.

Just forget & move on, you say?

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, I Feel Good!, Uncategorized

Have you ever wished people would forget the past and just move on? I sometimes thought this as I listened to the drama of family, friends, and co-workers. I now see this is easier said than done! One sunny afternoon, this thought resonated with me.

While running errands, I suddenly stopped and parked in front of a home I once lived. I had great dreams, hopes, and plans when I moved in! But I was also in the same position as most people: starting a new school experience, a new job, or even a new relationship. You know that place where we sit with so much hope and promise before life happens!

I soon compared my dreams and hopes to my actual experience. I had good times and success along the way, but I also endured a few setbacks and disappointments too. At one point, I even wondered if I had initially made the right decision to move here! I left my car to walk and ponder this period in my life.

Suddenly, I had an epiphany! My experience was necessary and got me to this point in my life! This home and neighborhood came with valuable lessons and personal growth. And yes, I could say the same about my university days, my job, and my relationships along the way. They represented key moments in my life, and so I’m glad I never missed them! I realized it’s not wise to second-guess and obsess about the past! I drove away convinced I should focus on the present and future.

The emotional dimension of wellness offers a window into the heart, mind, and soul. Indeed, I sometimes sort through old messy thoughts but inevitably focus on today and tomorrow. I also ask myself hard questions and face the answers with honesty and courage. Finally, I discovered this practice allows me to process everything and move on!

So, who are you following?

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Smart and Well

It’s good to hang out with people and groups that share your passion for wellness. To start, they offer advocacy, education, networking, and research. As I listened to a Global Wellness Institute Master Class on “2022 Trends Making Headlines,” I realized how much I value this connection. I listened intently as self-described “wellness nerds” spoke my language and shared my desire to understand the big and small picture.

What trends are there in 2022? A panel of wellness pros offered an update on the economy, industry jobs, return of red-hot leisure travel, metaverse in wellness, and growing consumer interest in the environment and sustainability. In addition, I was quite intrigued by the generational issues of Gen-Z, Gen-X, Millennials, and Boomers. They all think differently and have fascinating consumer profiles.

Experts addressed shifts in attitude about work, careers, money, and much more. Consumers once viewed wellness as a luxury, and now there’s a demand for democratization and accessibility. Indeed, we all want to be well! In addition, there is a greater interest in travel close to home, local destinations, and “micro-focused” community activities. Finally, a few speakers addressed the desire for less attention to fakery and obsession with body image in men and women.

Presenters looked into their crystal balls for 2023. The buzzwords for 2023 include sustainability, realness, connection with something significant (like spirituality?), hunger for more social connections, and an intense need for workplace-inspired wellness post-pandemic: For info, visit: https://www.globalwellnesssummit.com.

It’s wise to connect with professional groups that support you. Indeed, there is an endless number of professional groups, associations, and experts who offer good reliable information. However, the Global Wellness Institute (GWI) is one that keeps me challenged, committed, engaged, and excited about my journey.

Families & Wellness

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Caught In the middle, Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Uncategorized

This post isn’t about families sharing healthy meals and exercising together. Honestly, we can’t talk about wellness and ignore challenging family dynamics that often directly impact our own. We’re social beings and connected to someone from birth. So, while bingeing on an old TV drama recently, I could see fascinating ways families strengthen and hinder our wellness.

I watched Brothers & Sisters, a 2006 drama with an ensemble cast featuring Sally Field and Calista Flockhart. Calista played a fiery, conservative talk-show host, and Field was her equally opinionated, liberal mom. But unfortunately, politics can bring out the worst in families! Wonderful gatherings quickly descended into battles with wounded egos.

Besides politics, there are other potential minefields in families. For example, just like this tv family, today’s families sometimes confront issues and questions involving abuse, divorce, faith, money, sexuality, etc. Any one of these issues and many others test the strength of family bonds.

Birth order offers a fascinating wrinkle too. The oldest felt pressures and responsibilities their younger siblings didn’t have. And, of course, those in the middle felt abandoned or ignored! But amazingly, resentments also surfaced based on childhood memories, and some memories are decades old!

Being a television show, Brothers & Sisters dramatically introduced family secrets, or those parts of our lives long-buried. But, of course, this family had big, juicy secrets and no filter! Every secret saw the light of day, and there was no respect for privacy or boundaries in the family.

As we all traverse life, sometimes we do so with imperfect family memories and relationships. Yet, being wellness-focused makes us want to live better despite the past. You may conclude that your wellness journey is more important. Indeed, I hope we all smartly navigate our family drama and history and focus on healthy, loving connections. Just look beyond annoyances and distractions, and see clearly.

Hey, are you all in?

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Fitness, Lifestyles, Physical Therapy, Uncategorized

It’s easy to be wellness-obsessed and a bit poor in this country! I drew this conclusion after attending a health and wellness conference. I encountered many folks passionate about products and services but struggling to make the living they want and deserve.

Let’s face it; wellness professionals have knowledge, products, and services that could enhance and save lives! They believe in their message, but the financial rewards may not come until later. Some wellness professionals work two jobs, side hustles, and long hours. During the first year of the Pandemic, we saw severe shortfalls in benefits, including paid personal time, sick leave, and health insurance. In addition, some businesses closed forever.

The conference included wellness professionals from A to Z, such as exercise instructors, nurses, x-ray technicians, massage therapists, life coaches, personal trainers, physical therapists, mental health workers, nurses, teachers, etc. Honestly, it would take a big tent to include every wellness professional! But, we know they touch the mind, body, and spirit of clients, customers, and patients every day. So, their connection to wellness is professional and quite personal too.

But I can see the determination and grit of people here. Wellness professionals face challenges in their work but continue to believe in it and want to help others. They continue to work hard, refine skills, improve sales pitches, and focus on the future. They believe in what they do, manage setbacks, and possess remarkable patience for the long haul. I can’t help but think I’m in great company!

Show me what you can do!

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Fitness, I Feel Good!, Lifestyles, Uncategorized

He moved with the confidence and athleticism of a pro, running and jumping higher than ever! He’d also always stop, turn to acknowledge fans, and strike a pose! But there were no fans! No sir, it was just me, his annoyed little sister, watching my brother bask in the joy and magic of his latest pair of new sneakers. Many years later, I now understand.

Yes, I admit I feel more comfortable and energetic with new sneakers! But, of course, I don’t purchase them as often as my brother did, so necessity wins out when I do. I usually know I’m ready for new kicks when my feet feel the ground, my shoes are embarrassingly worn, or I must adjust and retie the strings for support.

Recently, I delayed purchasing sneakers as I stayed closer to home during the Pandemic. I wasn’t visiting the gym, so I didn’t need to worry about my clothes and shoes. I thought my old stuff was fine at home or in the neighborhood. In time, I realized I was wrong.

I discovered that purchasing new sneakers and apparel helped me begin to make exercise a priority. But I didn’t run out and break the bank! There’s a lot to sort through with affordable price points. Instead, I found that fresh colors, styles, and fabrics make my day and motivate me to get up and move!

My brother loved new sneakers long before “Just Do It” marketing campaigns, celebrity spokespersons, and many red-hot brands. He wore inexpensive sneakers (thanks, mom and dad!) and still felt like a champion or someone who could be! Funny, I get it now as I wear my new kicks. I completely understand why he was confident, happy, strong, and ready to take on the world!

My Crystal Ball

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness

In The Wizard of Oz, everyone is looking for something (courage, home, heart, wisdom), and I’m no different. So, if I could, I’d ask the big guy to tell me what’s next in my future?

After a year of blogging, I’m contemplating a new plan. My initial goal was to start writing. I brought into the Nike campaign, “Just do it!” But going forward, I want more than this. As I look at other blogs, I’m impressed. I see many smart, well-organized sites full of glitz, glam, and magnetic products and services. I wonder, should I up my game?

A simple blog initially appealed to me because I enjoy writing, researching, and discussing Health & Wellness issues. I love a deep dive into WebMD and Mayo Clinic websites. I’m excited by online newspapers and magazines that motivate me to share. Finally, a captivating webinar, a keynote address, or a conversation with a friend or family member moves me to act.

What’s next for me? I will continue to focus on a broader picture of H&W. I can dive deeply into one subject or be light, casual, and hopefully informing and persuasive on another. Frankly, after writing for a living and offering “Just the facts, mam,” it’s nice to have fun with it as a hobby. One organization I enjoy inspires writers by its very name, “Shut Up and Write!” Just do it, with no excuses! Yes, I want to do so, but be smarter about the process.

I could confess to the wizard that I have a not-so-secret dream of writing a novel. Ideas and characters are percolating in my mind! But, as they age, I’m drawn to people managing transitions, families, relationships, and work. So now, I’m content with my keyboard and imagination, one blog at a time.

Feeling good from head to toe!

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Fitness, I Feel Good!, Lifestyles, Physical Therapy

I just “graduated” from physical therapy! Today, I’m feeling like a million bucks relative to the PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL, and SPIRITUAL dimensions of wellness!

As I worked on the health challenge that brought me to physical therapy, I realized how much I missed the gym! Honestly, my exercise routine suffered a lot since Corvid. I didn’t feel comfortable in the health club and avoided mine for the last two-plus years.

Physical Therapy or “PT” helped reignite my excitement about exercising! It took me back to cardio (loving a great sweat!), stretching, and strength training. Suddenly, I could hear Patti Labelle in my ears, singing about my “New Attitude!” and that “I know where I’m going and I know what to do!” I’m now excited about smartly working out, and feeling that special “high” I missed. Oddly enough, I feel freer now and yet more grounded.

I normally go in a different direction with each post. For example, I recently completed one about how much I dreaded returning to physical therapy! So, this moment is about remembering the pure joy of exercise! But it’s also about having a deeper understanding of my experience, and response to the Pandemic. I know I’m not alone.

My graduation day didn’t include speeches, beautiful flowers, family gatherings, and gift cards! But I have to tell you that I loved my t-shirt (a parting gift!). Finally, I’m grateful for a more positive outlook on life, thankful for fabulous professional support, and I look forward to the future!

**Graduation T-Shirt From Physical Therapy**

What’s in a smile?

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Uncategorized

I thought I was just a good, educated consumer researching the backgrounds of potential new doctors. But I was also drawn to their smiles and lack of smiles. Yes, I realized a friendly smile was a tipping point as I made my choices! Am I crazy? Have you thought about the significance of a smile?

I’m drawn to a warm, inviting smile when working with medical professionals. The smile says, “come in, and you can trust me!” In contrast, a doctor with a long list of accomplishments and designations with a cold, stern, and unsmiling face tells me to keep my distance and not get too comfortable. But, honestly, beyond the medical community, I welcome openness and genuineness in the smiles of family and friends.

I’ve learned a smile can be alarmingly deceptive too, in my lifetime. Behind smiles, I’ve sensed insincerity, indifference, and a shocking lack of trustworthiness. In some, I’ve also discovered mockery, hostility, and cunning. Suddenly, my thoughts go to bullies, colleagues, politicians, and a few memorable salesmen.

I’m also more aware of the uncomfortable predicament of “unsmiling” people. I’ve known folks with dental problems, horrible teeth, or no teeth. Smiling is difficult and avoided. One of the best people I know comes to mind. After an accident, he was never one to smile and mastered a genuine tooth-less grin. I suspect we all know and love people who don’t smile or rarely share.

I considered majoring in “Human Development and Social Policy” in college, but I didn’t understand complicated human nature and interactions. Finally, a professor tried to explain how studying this area might help me in my career. As a collegiate, I was too naïve, but as an adult, I appreciated a smile and learned to look beyond it with greater understanding.

“Please, let me help you…”

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Lifestyles, Uncategorized

While this is the graduation season for students, I’m excited to be graduating soon from physical therapy! Seriously, let’s talk about physical therapy. Once again, I’ve discovered how important “PT” is after my body demands attention.

I recently met my new therapist. First, we spoke about why I came to therapy, she then instructed me to walk and observed my gait. Later, she proposed a treatment plan for my sore knees. I’ve had PT a few times and know that I always feel the worst before feeling better. So yes, I was feeling cynical and not happy to be back.

I dreaded the practice of prescribing lots of exercises with confusing instructions! I’m great at following directions in therapy, but I don’t do well at home. So, this time, my PT offered fewer exercises and focused on my mastery of a few. She also provided pictures, a mobile app, and a website. So, on my phone, computer, or smart tv, I could check-in, record my progress, and see each exercise performed slowly and flawlessly by a coach.

My therapy team is working to incorporate my exercises into my home exercise regimen. The student in me appreciates lessons in anatomy & physiology, and I enjoy enthusiastic teachers. While they frequently inquire about my comfort and pain level, they also remind me how amazing the body is and why specific movements are critical. As a result, I’m gaining greater flexibility, strength, and confidence in my mind and body.

I’m in awe of the patience, professionalism, and extensive training of physical therapists. I understand why adults must go back to basics, training the body to work again after illness and injury. Of course, we love to praise our excellent doctors and nurses, but don’t forget, physical therapists are heroes too!

Second Chances

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Lifestyles, Uncategorized

We love “second chances” in this country. But sadly, they sometimes elude people we love. We’ve all lost family and friends early, quickly, and unexpectedly. So, let’s pause and take a look at what a precious second chance is and what it could mean for us.

After the recent sudden loss of a few family members, I concluded that some people don’t get second chances! Indeed, it was too late for them by the time they arrived at the emergency room. They didn’t arrive in time for state-of-art trauma care or have another chance to improve or change their situation.

A friend spoke about the hesitancy of some, particularly men, to even go to the doctor! Some are just scared and refuse to visit the doctor unless their pain is 911 or excruciating! He recalled how his dad used old-school homemade salves to manage pain. Unfortunately, his dad’s situation reminded me of my own family.

But hey, “second chances” could be proactive measures we take that promote optimal health. It could be conducting online research on a health issue or scheduling an annual physical. Your second chance could be a flu shot, a vaccine, or taking prescribed medications for high blood pressure and diabetes. Perhaps your second chance is an open, honest talk with your spouse, or together with your doctor. Maybe it’s a colonoscopy, physical therapy, or routine lab work.

Our “second chance” isn’t limited to a dramatic lifesaving trip to the ER! In fact, every day offers an opportunity to make intelligent choices and decisions about our health. So, I must ask, how are you managing a new day and the opportunity for a “second chance” in your life?

Grief

Featured by ETWellness, posted in Uncategorized

We all have a personal story about grief. We have lost people we loved or will in time. That was the premise of one speaker at a recent Toastmasters event.

She spoke about the pain of loss, shared a profile of loved ones, and the motivation behind many new activities in her life now. These helped fill some of the space. Grief is not easy to discuss, and my friend drew us in with light humor.

As she spoke, I couldn’t help but think about the family and friends I had lost recently and even decades ago! Yet, there is still space in my heart and vivid memory of smiles, laughter, and many large and small idiosyncrasies! A good example is my dad, who died thirty years ago. I remember his voice, tall stature, and many funny and wise sayings.

Today’s grown-up lesson is that grief is real and shared, and everyone we love leaves something precious behind! Just stop and think about a relay race and the passing of the baton. Our loved ones ran hard, lived as long and fully as possible, but ultimately stopped and passed on the baton.

I’m suddenly smiling, thinking about the “gifts” of so many. I feel I can go on and live my life, empowered, having known and loved many beautiful people who graced my life.

How to Appreciate a Good Manager: Career Reflections

September 7, 2025 by ETWellness, posted in Careers, Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Mental health, Smart and Well

My boss suddenly announced his retirement: “I’ve nothing to prove and I’ve worked a gazillion years!” I clapped and smiled, publicly supporting him, but privately I pondered. It has been a while, so this is a good time to share a few notes from my work diary.

Indeed, he’s been a great manager – fair, fun, honest, and even-tempered. He treats our team like grown-ups, professionals, and gets out of our way! He also doesn’t smother us with his presence or title. He simply manages a team, a WFH one too, with accountability, and respect. How would you rate your own? What would you like to see in your current or next manager?

I can’t assume the newbie will be so agreeable! They all come with different management styles, levels of maturity, and work experience. I know a bad boss can have a huge impact on careers and mental health! The worst ones left a lasting impression and motivated me to treat others well. In time, I found greater confidence and a stronger voice. Family, friends, faith, and mentors all helped. So, keep a strong support system!

I’m not far from my manager in age, so I find myself reflecting on my career journey. There is something exhilarating and inspiring about working with decent, positive, supportive people every day. Managers who listen are rock stars! Great ones share their own stories, their expertise, and mentor others. Everyone should experience at least one commited to their growth and success – not just his or her own!

I’m appreciative of all the lessons I’ve learned. I’m so thankful for work, skills mastered, wonderful colleagues, and a paycheck. But, I also welcome my exit some day. Like my boss, I hope to say I’ve done enough and know it’s time to move on.

How to Prepare for Home Disasters in 2025

January 30, 2025January 30, 2025 by ETWellness, posted in Lifestyles, Mental health, Smart and Well, Uncategorized

We’re all shell-shocked by fires, hurricanes, and more in the news! Several years ago, my family experienced a devastating fire in our home. I worked for an insurance company, so given the horrific California wildfires, I have a different perspective to offer you.

CHECK in with your insurance agent! – Share changes in the family (marriages, divorces, new members, etc.). Discuss any highly valued personal property or new purchases. Have you remodeled recently? Ask about Additional Living Expenses! We lived in a hotel for seven months while contractors rebuilt our home! Overall, are you satisfied with your coverage?

Records – Use your cell phone to take pictures of rooms or make a “home sweet home” video! Next, revisit where you store important documents. Invest in a fire-resistant lock box at home, a more secure safety deposit box, or place documents online in the cloud! Looking back, I lost documents temporarily stored in an accordion file. Please make better choices!

Trauma –The American Red Cross provided crisis support and guidance to our family. Losing your home or being displaced ushers in an overwhelming feeling of unease and personal vulnerability! So, remember, there is no shame or judgment in getting help! Now may also be a great time to donate to relief agencies!

Rebuilding – Be patient. Patience is a lot to expect, but it takes time for insurance adjusters to visit, workers to clear and clean, and contractors to hire. We also learned that contractors work on several projects simultaneously, delaying rebuilding efforts! Housing inspectors must also inspect. Folks, it takes a village to rebuild your home; this process is not overnight.

Somewhere, someone is facing the worst days of their life. Please be proactive! Consider how you can protect yourself and your family! No one thinks a disaster can happen to them. Be well and safe in 2025!

Start Strong – I wish somebody had told me how!

November 15, 2024 by ETWellness, posted in Careers, Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Lifestyles, Smart and Well

Sometimes, I’m wise and compelled to share! A young family member recently joined the world of work! No one asked me, but I shared a few things I’ve learned over the years:

Your first job is your gateway to the “real” world! You’ll gain valuable insight into companies, industries, products, and services. You’ll find the culture of your job is very different from school! Your work now will add greater depth to your formal education. After this, no employer can salute your education but claim you don’t have experience!

So, relax and stay awhile! You are in a great place to be a newbie, ask many questions, and learn. But keep an open mind and stay alert, too! With experience and a more extensive network, another job may soon speak to you! Maybe you’ll make a move within the same company! Remember, this is your first job and not your last!

You’ve got money, honey! Your new shiny paycheck offers power and responsibility! So, get familiar with the “B” word – budget, and allow for fun, clothes, rent, travel, savings, etc. I highly recommend financial guru Suzy Orman and her book, “Young Fabulous & Broke!” I want you to be young, fabulous, and financially savvy!

You’ve got a boss! Your boss is not your parent, buddy, or favorite professor. Learn what is essential to her and your role and keep the lines of communication open! Accountability is important. Expect feedback from the boss, customers, and colleagues too! Listen and grow with this feedback!

Rock some healthy choices! You’ll soon find too many pizza parties, cake days, and donuts at work. Food is everywhere, and there is plenty of free-flowing alcohol when entertaining customers. So, as work becomes busy or crazy, stay grounded with family, friends, faith, exercise, and hobbies! You must take care of your mind, body, and spirit.

Yes, newbie, I’ve learned a few things from working! Unfortunately, I was often bored and impatient at my first job, and I thought I was destined for something else. I learned to chill and appreciate the moment, and the benefits and opportunities came! Once again, congratulations, young professionals! Pay attention and start strong.

OMG, the class reunion!

September 28, 2023 by ETWellness, posted in Uncategorized

This reunion year is huge! Let’s just say I’m a mature graduate! But, like many people, I’m stressing about what to wear and more importantly, what it all means! Can a school reunion be good for my health and well-being? I have a couple of thoughts to share.

First, we now look like our parents instead of the students I remember! I find this disturbing and funny, too! Somehow, I thought of others (like my parents) getting older, not me, not us! There is a mix of emotions about aging, a little insecurity (work, retirement, and life), and grudging acceptance. After all, we are adults now! I wouldn’t want to change time and return to my 18- or 21-year-old self, would you?

Second thought, we represent a rich, diverse group. Our adult lives reflect meaningful work, marriage, divorce, children, travel, and more. Our connection to the school was not just classes but a solid affinity for clubs, organizations, and communities reflecting us. Your “community” could have been band, team sports, fraternities, LBGT, language clubs, theater, and students (Hispanic, Jewish, African, etc.). Schools (especially colleges) nurture and support many communities and interests under one big tent.

My third thought takes me to the inevitable comparison game! I look around at many accomplished people and wonder: ‘Have I done enough personally and professionally?’ Did I fully challenge myself? Some classmates did what they said they would, while others landed in other roles and places. Grown-up me knows everyone has faced detours, successes, and failures in life.

So, we’re returning to our alma mater! Admittedly, I’m grateful! For me, college facilitated many incredible adventures and life experiences. I regret not sticking with Spanish and pursuing a study abroad program! Back then, I gave up too quickly when challenged! Today, I’m confident and open to learning! That’s the endearing gift of school!

My friends and I decided to embrace the moment and have fun. Cheers to all! Go Cats!

Hey, what’s your story?

August 26, 2023 by ETWellness, posted in Finding My Place in Health & Wellness, Lifestyles

My fellow travelers eyed me curiously as one older lady inquired at the dinner table, “What’s your story?” With all eyes focused on me, I laughed, put down my fork and knife, and shared. I had a story and purpose for visiting Cuba.

Years later, that moment stayed with me as I read a self-published autobiography of a family member. Some in the family wondered what she had to say and why. One person admitted she didn’t care for this type of writing but enjoyed books about celebrities. She believed they had great stories!

You couldn’t be more wrong, I thought. You needn’t be rich, famous, or popular to have a story! You don’t need to be infamous or saintly, either. Protagonists also don’t have to be esteemed artists, musicians, politicians, scientists, etc. to have a story worth telling!

In my cousin’s book, she shared remarkable accomplishments in public service, church, education, and law enforcement. Her humanity, grit, and faith appealed to me as she discovered her life’s purpose. She was a child, woman, mother, and daughter taking steps forward and backward with seismic missteps. Her story was raw and authentic.

I’ve also loved books about athletes, actors, billionaires, and wellness gurus chronicling their paths to fame and fortune. Why do we put them and their stories on a pedestal but not show respect for ordinary folks who aren’t fixtures in the news? Someone must have a crazy, wild, or dramatic “movie of the week” sized story to impress us!

These are strange times, and our overly stimulated senses make us demanding! Instead of simply being curious and open to whatever experience a writer offers, we look to be entertained and enthralled.

When I shared “my story” about why I traveled to Cuba many years ago, I knew my trip was a small part of my life journey. My table listened because we all had our reasons for traveling. One day, I hope to share my larger story in a book. I salute my cousin for boldly sharing her autobiography and feel inspired.